I’M FREE WOOOO WORST EXPERIENCE OF MY LIFE.
Everyone says junior year is the hardest. My own super-smart-is-about-to-graduate-valedictorian- girlfriend told me last summer junior year is the hardest year of high school. I laughed in her face.
Junior year was the hardest year of my whole academic life. Well academic and personal life I guess. The worst part? This year didn’t teach me anything expect that everything I’m doing is wrong. How fun.
On paper my classes weren’t supposed to be that hard, school’s always been a breeze for me anyways. And then I got a B in math. My. First. B. Ever. Shit hit the fan after that. I ended the year with an A and liked my teacher a lot but it’s still “Fuck period 1 Honors Precalc” forever. Aside from math there was also physics. Notoriously difficult physics with a brand-spanking-new-teacher who had clearly never been in a classroom in his whole life and creeped everyone in the building out. We got through approximately three lessons, all of which I taught myself. You can imagine how fast I darted out that class. The rest of my classes really were a breeze. Highlights include my APUSH teacher and my AP Lang writing assignments. Another cool part of this year was my college broadcasting class (a literal dream come true). But I’ll never get over the mental toll of this year. I was failing tests left and right, throwing my future down the drain, breaking down and falling apart- it really, really sucked. My mental health typically doesn’t improve year to year, so I’ve stopped trying to compare and say that one is worse than another when the truth is they’re all bad years. But man this year sucked the life out of me. I stopped dreaming and feeling and it all went really dark and quiet for a long time. I guess I found my way back, but I’m still in a lot of tiny pieces. Maybe I would feel different if I truly learned something from all of this, but I really didn’t. Not anything useful anyways. I can’t sit here and pretend it was all bad though… I spent this year with my friends. I try not to attach to people too easily- I know I won’t speak to most people three months from now- but this year I truly found my people. They’re real and here and the best people I’ve ever had in my life. So maybe I did learn something: find your fucking people, you’ll never survive alone.
This article got really negative but let me say one more time…
I’M FREEEEE.
Oh this is where it gets good. I’m officially a senior, who would’ve thought? Not me clearly. I’m gonna apply to college and go new places and learn to do what I love for an actual career.. it almost sounds too good to be true. Bring it on.
- Class of 2023.
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